The Erotic Mind-Control Story Archive

He awoke as the blonde rose at 9:30. Lazily, he reached for her, but she squeezed from his embrace and stood, magnificently nude, looking down on him. “I don’t want to ruin it,” she said tenderly. “If I stop this now, it will always be perfect in my memory.”

He smiled up into her eyes, and he was glad that she didn’t pull away again as he took her hand. “Thank you, Thea. You helped me. I was in a really dark place last night.”

“I’m not going to tell,” she told him.

“Not going to tell who what?” he asked mildly.

“I’m not going to tell anybody about this. Not the girls I’m with, not George, not anyone. Not now, not ever. I’m going to what we did … and how you helped me … for the rest of my life, and it’s always going to be my secret.”

“Do you think one last kiss would ruin perfect?” he asked.

She leaned down and kissed him tenderly. Then she turned and dressed, even putting on the bra that had been stuffed into her purse. He watched for a minute, then found that he had dozed, because the room was empty. She never said goodbye.

Taking a deep breath, resolved to get on with it, he rose, fixing the small coffee pot and getting it going before heading to the bathroom to shower and shave. He refused to even think about Dinah, since he had no idea how he was going to begin the task … whatever the hell the task really was. Twenty-five grand to “influence” a fucking boob-job? What the hell did that asshole …? No. It was better not to think about it.

Going to the forward “B” Deck dining area meant walking past the swimming pool. He was still fifteen minutes early, but he’d finished the small pot of coffee in his room, and he needed another cup. And there they were, all three of them, sitting in lounge chairs in the late morning sun; though, before he could get to them, Dinah and Tina had risen and started walking away. His call stopped them. Tina, in a two-piece swimsuit, was fastening some sort of wrap around her waist, but Dinah was in white shorts and a light flowery blouse. When she met his gaze, Dinah, for some reason, looked down and blushed.

“Hey, big guy,” Beth grinned up from the lounge chair. “Want to me? Those two have an errand to run.”

“Dinah and I have an appointment for breakfast,” he replied. “Want to us?”

“Already eaten,” Beth said. “Grab a chair. They’ll be back in half an hour.”

“We had an appointment,” he said a little more emphatically; though he immediately thought better of it. “Sorry,” he said pleasantly, holding up both hands in surrender. “I suppose it isn’t that time-critical. Please go do whatever you have to do.”

Dinah was blushing even harder. Tina smiled as she led her companion away toward the main shopping area. “Thanks, doctor. I’ll have her back to you soon.”

“Call me Jimmy.”

That made Tina smile even broader. “Oh, I would LOVE to call you Jimmy!” And she pulled the red-faced girl away.

Jimmy walked several feet to retrieve an upright pool chair. The area was very sparsely populated because the ship had already docked in Ensenada, and most engers were probably ashore. He noted that two men were eyeing them openly, and he imagined that they were watching to see if he was going to stay with the ravishing girl in the green bikini. Eventually, they sighed and walked away.

“Where are those two going?” he asked, nodding toward the girls who had deserted them.

“You don’t want to know.”

“I DO want to know,” he said emphatically. “I really need to talk to Dinah.”

“No,” Beth said levelly, “you do NOT want to know.”

“Beth ….”

She shrugged. “Last night, after the show, Dinah and her husband went back to their cabin. He literally ripped off her clothes, threw her on the floor … on the FLOOR, Jimmy! … jerked down his pants and plunged right in, balls deep. Pretty much just as you told her it was going to happen, huh?”

He felt the blood drain from his face. “Oh, my God!” He strove to find the words he wanted, but finally settled for: “Did he hurt her badly?”

Beth took a steadying breath and let her features soften. “No, I don’t think he hurt her. Just shocked her, mostly. I don’t know what she was anticipating, really. She kept saying that she just wanted to please him, be a good wife, and yada yada. She said that she felt satisfied afterwards; but I got the feeling that she wasn’t talking about being sexually satisfied herself … she was only happy that she had satisfied HIM.”

“Aw, crap!” He thought for a moment. “And where are they going?”

“She’s innocent, Jimmy! More innocent than any girl I think I’ve ever met! It’s not that she isn’t intelligent. I think she’s smart as can be! She just doesn’t KNOW! That wasn’t her first time. At least, she said it wasn’t; though she was sort of vague. She mumbled something about them having done it before. But she doesn’t seem to know a lot of the basics; know what I mean?” She paused as Jimmy gave her a firm look. “She doesn’t know about sexual hygiene, Jimmy. She’s having a little … um … odor problem this morning.”

“Oh.”

“Told you you didn’t want to know!” She paused a long minute to let him digest it all. “I really, really, really like her, Jimmy! I mean, I REALLY do! But the more I find out, the LESS I like that husband of hers.”

“Oh, you would not be-lieve!” he muttered.

That made her perk up. “Tell me!”

He took a deep breath and frowned. “Beth, I think I’m going to have to start thinking of Dinah as a patient; or at the very least, at this point, as a prospective patient. And that means confidentiality.”

“Aw, Jimmy! No fair! I told YOU!”

He shook his head. “Come on, Beth. You know the rules. If SHE wants to tell you something … or everything, for that matter … then I certainly won’t stand in the way. But if a patient tells me something in confidence, then no one … including her friends and her husband … will ever hear it from me. It HAS to be that way!”

“No fair!” she muttered again softly, looking away from him. After a long moment, she glanced up. “She wants to go with Tina and me when we go shopping in town today. That’s okay, isn’t it?”

He took a breath and checked his watch. “Can you give me a couple hours with her first? Say, one-thirty? That should give you a few hours in the plaza shopping before the ship sails at six. Deal? Have her talk to her husband about tonight, if you want to get together with her. I’ll be busy with the second performance, anyway, so maybe the three of you can hang out then as well.”

“We sure don’t want to be around HIM! But … okay. I’ll talk to Tina about it.”

“Were you and Tina together last night?”

“Yes. And before you say anything, I did NOT initiate anything … SHE did! She said she didn’t want to be alone; and so, of course, I volunteered. But I told her right up front about my … uh … proclivities; and that I wouldn’t touch her. I’d just stay with her. And that’s exactly what I did! I was Little Miss Prim and Proper! And I listened to her until the wee hours of the morning. And I held her while she cried. She was head-over-heels about the guy that stood her up. They live together. Or did before this happened. But he didn’t even answer her texts or phone calls! And last night, I never touched her sexually! I swear! Then, sometime after the sun came up, I woke up and she was kissing me. And she said she’d never done it with a girl before. And, oh, Jimmy, I’m in love!”

“You’re always in love.”

“This time, it’s different!”

“It’s always different.”

“I was there when she needed me. And this morning, she was there when I needed her! And Jimmy … it was wonderful!”

“And if it ever turns out not to be wonderful, I’ll be there for you to tell me all about it,” he said gently.

She smiled shyly. “You’re always there for me. But just you wait! You’ll see!”

“I’m happy for you, Beth.”

She got up and hugged him. There were a couple cat-calls from guys around the pool.

Dinah and Tina walked toward them from the direction of the aft staterooms. Tina took off her wrap when she got to them, and Jimmy thought she was pushing out her chest a little as she looked at him and smiled with lidded eyes. He felt a smirk coming on, but kept his face imive. Dinah handed him a key card. The number was for an “A” deck poolside room, one deck over them, and he shaded his eyes as he looked around and above until he spotted it.

“Let me see the key card for YOUR room,” he ordered; and Dinah produced it. He didn’t take it, but his frown deepened. This whole gig made less and less sense as things progressed. Melnyk had indicated that he’d gotten this extra room for their “sessions” for the whole cruise. Why in God’s name had he arranged for a poolside room for this extra-curricular task, while they stayed in an inside lower cabin for their honeymoon? He sighed heavily. “Are you ready for breakfast? They’re about to stop serving.”

“Can I stay here for a few more minutes, and you bring me a muffin?”

He couldn’t help smiling at her. “Sure. Coffee?”

“A glass of milk?”

“I’ll be back.”

After he’d piled pastries, coffee and a carton of milk on a cardboard carry-out tray from the buffet, he made his way back to the pool and tarried a while to let the girls gossip and giggle while he nibbled and drank his coffee. But eventually, he led Dinah up a flight of outdoor steps and to the room that Melnyk had arranged for them. Nice place. He could either draw the curtains or adjust them for varying degrees of outside light; and the sounds of the pool area below them were muffled to the point that, with the A/C on, they were eliminated entirely. The furniture included a couch and a cushioned chair, and he chose the chair, facing her.

“Do you have any idea why your husband wants me to talk to you?”

Holy crap, she was pretty! Her hair swayed left and right, caressing the shoulders of her thin blouse as she shook her head, her eyes wide and intent. He had tried to come up with some sort of script for this discussion; but already, he was diverting from that. He realized that if he spent too long choosing the right words, he’d sound as insecure as he felt. And if he started speaking from rote, he’d sound like a sideshow hawker sensing an easy target. He sighed.

“I know your secret,” Dinah interrupted his thoughts.

“Oh, you do?”

“Yes. You, Jimmy, are a great big pussycat!”

He had been leaning forward, but he sat back. “Oh, I am?”

“Yes,” she said definitively. “It’s the first thing Beth ever told me. Oddly enough, at the time, we were sitting, stark naked in front of a hundred people.”

Jimmy barked a laugh. “My hypnotic subjects conspiring onstage behind my back! I never anticipated that!”

“Whatever this is all about,” the girl said in a small voice, “I don’t want to cause you undue concern. And for some reason, you seem sort of stressed by it.” She let that sink in. “Why not just come out and say it, whatever it is?”

He was still learning the ropes in his chosen field, but it sometimes felt as if HE was the patient. He gave another sigh. “Do you love your husband, Dinah?”

She answered more quickly than he expected. “If it isn’t love, I sincerely wish that it was. I WANT to love him. Does that make sense?”

He regarded her with renewed respect. “Not really, but I think you’ve summed up the way a lot of folks consider it.” He took another deep breath. “You’re going to think I’m getting way off topic here, but humor me. I believe you are a very pretty girl.” He paused while she blushed. “What do YOU think of yourself; your appearance; your face and your body.”

She shrugged expansively while he tried valiantly to concentrate on her face. “I never really think about it. I work almost exclusively with young children, and the sisters at the convent and the school. Until Ivan, I don’t think I’ve ever overtly tried to impress a man. I read novels, of course. I know how sex works. Or, at least, I think I do for the most part.” She was silent for a long time. “I’m not sure how much about my life I should tell you.”

“Dinah, I’m a clinical psychologist. Well, I’m actually an intern. I still have one semester to go at Cal State. Anyway, I already have patients; and with your consent, I would like to consider you one, as well. You can think of me as your doctor. I will never, ever divulge anything you tell me in confidence, to your husband or anyone else. You have my word.”

She nodded. “I don’t like my breasts. I never have. Ever since I got them. They’re small, and they’re flat, and they sag. At first, I simply didn’t care. I was going to be a nun. I took my temporary vows as a novice when I turned eighteen. Most people think vows are forever, but the first ones aren’t. And over the past three years, I knew … I just knew … that I wasn’t going to stay. So, this year, officially, I left the order. But I got my teaching certificate while I was with them, and I absolutely love working with the kids at the center.

“I met Ivan in the park, and he talked me into going for a walk with him; and then dinner. I had a couple glasses of wine, which I’m not used to. And somehow or another, we wound up in bed. My first time. And of course … of course … I got pregnant. But Ivan never hesitated. He said he loved me. He wanted to marry me. And he was all I really had. I told my mother I was pregnant; and she, in turn, told my father; and he told me they never wanted to see me again.”

Jimmy was really shaken by the confession. “Uh … congratulations. When are you due?”

“I’m not. I don’t know what happened, but I had my period. Maybe I miscarried … or maybe it was a false positive test. Anyway, we’d already arranged for everything. Arranged for the marriage, I mean. He acted so excited about being together … about having a baby … and he had been so selfless, so understanding … that I never even considered not marrying him.”

“I see.” Jimmy considered everything he’d heard. “Dinah, your husband tells me that the two of you have talked about breast augmentation surgery.”

She blushed even more than she had been. “I … didn’t know. That he’d talked about it with you, I mean. He and I have discussed it. He says I should go ahead … that he’s ready to do it for me. But … I’ve never had any surgery before. I guess I’m sort of nervous about it.”

And there it was. Had he really been so wrong about everything? Had he actually misread the whole situation? Was this just a case of merely relieving a pretty girl’s anxiety about a routine medical procedure?

“Dinah,” he said seriously, “I can help you overcome your feelings of unease and apprehension about this simple operation. I need to tell you, honestly, that I, personally, think your … um … body type is very attractive; and quite frankly, from the reaction of the audience last night … so does everybody else. But this is YOUR decision, and if you are sure that this is the direction you want to go, I’d be happy to assist you through therapy.”

The girl studied him carefully. “If you become my doctor,” she said quietly, “can you still be my friend?”

He laughed. “Count on it.” He took a breath and thought. “Okay. The girls said they wanted to go into the plaza to shop; and I sort of promised Beth that I’d let you them at one-thirty. If this is the course that YOU want to pursue, then we’ll work with establishing hypnotic states for a while. Your husband said we can use this room for the whole cruise, and I have a few things to get ready for tonight’s performance, anyway. Let’s meet by the pool again tomorrow, just like this morning, and we’ll be able to wrap things up well before I have to get ready for the last night’s show. Sound okay? Hopefully, we’ll be able to conquer any fears and anxiety before you and your husband meet your medical professionals when you get back in town.”

“I’m going to be doing it that soon, then?” she asked.

“He hasn’t told you?” he countered. “He said there was something about only having access to funds for a short time.” Again, he felt unease with the way Melnyk was setting everything up. “What does your husband do for a living?”

“He’s in insurance. He works at Fortification Insurance Corporation in Burbank.”

Jimmy considered this. That was the largest agency on the west coast. “What’s he do? Sales?”

“I’m not sure. He said something about ‘actual’ something-something.”

“Actuarial tables?”

She brightened. “Yeah! That’s it!”

But that made even less sense. Why would funds amounting to well over twenty-five grand be available for only a short period? It couldn’t possibly be related to his work. But … that didn’t really have anything to do with the task at hand.

For the next hour and a half, he worked with her using various trance states. Holy cow! She was susceptible to just about every kind of hypnosis he’d ever tried: Ericksonian, eye fixation, arm levitation, progressive relaxation, countdown, confusion, and even shock induction. He kept waking her and putting her back under, and she seemed very comfortable with the process. Being with her like this, however, was bringing back all the feelings he had experienced last night. It would be SO easy to fall for this pretty young lady. Keep it professional, he kept chiding himself.

At one o’clock, he made sure that she was awake, alert and in a good mood for her shopping trip with the girls; and he bid her adieu. He had other matters to attend to, anyway. The main stage was used for a general-audience production at seven, and there was a lot of setup that had to be done before the midnight show could go on again. He was more than a little surprised when Melnyk knocked on his dressing room door at 9:30.

“Dinah tells me that she spent most of the day shopping!” he groused. “I went to a lot of time, effort and money to get you that room for your therapy sessions, and I intended for you to utilize it for more than just an hour or two!”

Jimmy looked carefully at the man, who seemed more-or-less the same as he had the previous night, though he now smelled distinctly of liquor. Normally, he would have bristled at the comment, but he was sick of experiencing the rollercoaster emotions he was having for this person. Looking almost bored, he responded.

“Mr. Melnyk, I do not well-tolerate micromanagement. You insinuated that the room was available for the duration of the cruise; and I intended to utilize it tomorrow to complete our therapy. But I’m not sure it’s really necessary. I like your wife a lot. I can just chalk this up to helping a friend. You go have a seat out in the theater, and I’ll go back to my room and get your five grand. Let’s just forget the whole thing. I’ll get you the names of a few psychologists that might be able to ….”

But he stopped at the other man’s expression. THIS was the look he had been trying to instill on the guy’s face the night before! Melnyk looked startled, unsettled, ill-at-ease … and just plain scared. “Please, Mr. Rankstrom!” he implored. “Please forgive me! I meant no offense. I was just ….” He seemed at a loss for words. “I … um … have been alone today without my wife’s company. I have been drinking. I should not have come here. Yes, you have use of the cabin on “A” deck all day tomorrow. Please use it any way you want. It is completely yours for as long as you need it. I will leave you now. Thank you again for consenting to help my wife. Good day.” And he turned and fled.

Holy crap! What a weird dude! Jimmy couldn’t risk spending too much time thinking about this before another act, but he snatched up his cell and texted Beth, asking to meet with her after the act, about 1:30 AM. In just a few minutes, she replied, naming a bar down on “C.”

The production went off without a hitch; and, feeling good about it, he made his way to the meeting with Beth. Tina was with her, and they were holding hands, each wearing a sort of goofy, just-fucked expression. Jimmy could only smile at them, as he motioned to a waitress and treated himself to a double-Jack on the rocks, which was sort of becoming his “unwinding” drink of choice lately. He shook his head as he regarded the two love-struck females. Beth had absolutely horrible luck with love. This certainly appeared promising; but the chances were not good, based on her track record.

“I need your help,” he told them after he’d been served. “Was Dinah okay during your time ashore today?”

They both responded that they’d had a wonderful afternoon, and hoped to spend more time with Dinah tomorrow, if she could. Jimmy considered picking his words carefully, but finally decided to come right out with his concerns.

“Do you think her husband has ever physically abused her?” he asked, looking from one of them to the other.

“Funny you should ask that,” Beth responded. “I asked her the same question. Exactly. She seemed shocked by it, and categorically denied that he’d ever harmed her in any way. But after hearing her talk about him, I get the distinct impression that emotional abuse might rear its ugly head frequently.”

“Like, maybe constantly,” Tina interjected. “Just about all her plans include phrases like ‘… if Ivan says it’s okay,’ and ‘… if Ivan will let me.’ I’ve never met this guy, and quite frankly, I’m not sure if I ever really want to.”

“But nothing physical,” Jimmy murmured. He shook his head, realizing that he was once again right back where he had started. No evidence. Nothing to prove that all of his feelings weren’t just prejudice. He downed his drink and stood. “Thank you, ladies. May I treat you to lunch tomorrow in the Rainbow Lounge? I’ll bring Dinah with me. Time for bed!”

Beth smiled broadly and held Tina’s hand lovingly. “We’ve been in bed since we left Ensenada! We’re going to party a little! We’ll see you for lunch!”

The Rainbow Lounge was so called because it was between two large bars: one that was especially used by the gay engers, and one that was predominantly for the lesbian patrons. But the ship’s employees all knew that the lounge restaurant boasted the best chef on the vessel, and some truly amazing dishes could be enjoyed there. As a result, lunch the next day was a particularly pleasant affair. Dinah, who was experiencing numerous things for the first time in her life, was exuberant and often little-girlish; while her three companions found joy just from being around her.

Jimmy never indulged in alcohol for lunch, but he ordered a nice bottle of wine for the ladies; and they were suddenly having the time of their lives, whispering and laughing and even, at one point, singing. Tina and Beth begged Jimmy to let their new friend spend the afternoon poolside with them, but time was running out and he still needed a few hours with her, knowing that he’d never be able to complete the therapy sessions otherwise. That’s when Dinah dropped a bombshell: her husband had told her she could spend the entire evening, including dinner, with her “shopping girlfriends,” if she wanted. Beth and Tina were overjoyed, but the statement absolutely floored Jimmy.

All the old doubts and worries were back. What the hell kind of husband wants a honeymoon where his wife spends her days in independent therapy sessions locked alone in a room with another man, and her nights gallivanting around the ship with other women? Again, nothing made sense! Melnyk talked as if he was in love with her, but there was absolutely zero romance. But … once more … there was nothing actually wrong with that; it was just something Jimmy didn’t agree with.

Back in their little cabin overlooking the pool area, they resumed where they had left off that morning. Jimmy had Dinah in an almost instantaneous, exceedingly deep hypnotic trance state. She was so susceptible to his inductions, so compliant and accepting, that he came to believe that this was the answer to her problem. He had seen the type before. Dinah was one of those women who not only agreed to relinquish control to another, she wanted it; more than wanted … she actually craved it. In others, that normally led to further desires and fixations, such as bondage. But, of course, Dinah had never been exposed to those; and with the kind of husband she now had, she most probably never would be.

Jimmy decided to use her desire to his benefit. He began discussing it with her deepest subconscious self. Instead of fixating on the surgical procedure itself, he asked her to imagine the loss of control she would experience through the anesthesia. He assumed that she would be sedated for the operation, but he looked it up to make sure. And yes, there was usually a sedative, then a general anesthetic, all istered intravenously. He would concentrate on that aspect of the thing, and if he could get her to look forward to that the way she seemed to want to surrender to hypnosis, she’d be distracted enough to forget her anxiety about the procedure itself. On the other hand, he didn’t want her to go out looking for that type of release through the use of illicit drugs, so there had to be some roadblocks installed.

He was shocked to find that he’d been droning on for almost another three hours! After a few text messages to Beth, he woke Dinah for the last time and took her down to the pool area to meet them. They’d purchased a swimsuit for their new friend, something Jimmy would have loved to see her in. But alas, he had a show to prepare for; and he bid them a fond farewell. Assuming she might never see him again, Dinah hugged him warmly, thanked him, and kissed him on the cheek.

He was surprised again by a knock on the dressing room door at nine, and even more surprised when Melnyk spoke courteously and appreciatively. “I understand you were with her in the room for almost five hours today!” he said with apparent excitement. “You have my thanks. I believe your efforts will most certainly lead to my wife’s satisfaction. If you check your bank balance, you will see that I have deposited the full remaining amount, simply based on your obvious accomplishments. You have my undying thanks.”

“Where the hell did you get my bank number?” Jimmy barked before he could stop himself. He supposed he ought to show a little appreciation.

Melnyk seemed to take no offense, and shrugged with a small grin. “I am rather adept when it comes to computer systems. And, I believe that if you ask your good friend Beth, she will tell you that it’s actually very easy to deposit money into an . The safeguards all go the other way.”

“Computers,” Jimmy mumbled. “Ah, yes. Actuarial tables.”

Now Melnyk showed surprise, but he recovered quickly. “Oh. She told you. Actually, I’m a little surprised that she even ed the term.”

Jimmy didn’t want to think about any of this right now. The show this evening went on two hours earlier than the previous shows because the ship would dock back in Long Beach in the morning. As a result, it was different altogether … what he liked to think of the “R-rated” show. That actually took a lot more preparation. There were limits, where sexuality was concerned. A lot less nudity, a lot more acting like chickens and dogs and pussycats. And he would soon have to go up into the riggings to scope out the crowd.

Melnyk accepted his polite dismissal, thanked him once again, and walked out. It was only afterwards that Jimmy thought to wonder: How had the man known that Beth, someone he had never met, worked in banking? But … there was no time to think about Melnyk or Beth or anything else right now. Compartmentalization! Just think about the act!

The performance was a success, at least as far as he and the audience were concerned. After securing everything for the evening backstage, he cruised a couple bars looking for the girls, but he didn’t think it worth texting or calling. He stuck with one drink, and headed back to his room. Logging onto his laptop, he found that, sure enough, he was now twenty thousand dollars richer, not counting the envelope of cash he had in his room safe. He was going to make it! He’d signed up for five more short cruises with the company, and this would do it. He could now swing the last semester. He could start his career debt-free. He had actually achieved one of his major financial life goals.

Now … if he could only shake the feeling that he’d just made the biggest mistake of his entire life.

A ship only makes money while it’s at sea. In port, it spends money: on fees and supplies and services and taxes. Alas, it cannot stay away from shore forever. It has to stop for fuel and repairs and stores and personnel and a myriad of other things. The average lifespan of a cruise ship is about thirty years, and that period is broken up into three distinct phases. The first fifteen years comprise its peak earnings period; while the third phase, the last five years, sees it into retirement and eventual scrap. The Bawdy Strumpet was well into its second phase, that ten-year period when things wore out or simply went wrong. In the past five years, it had changed cruise lines three times, resulting in a name change with each new company.

The sexual-themed cruises had gained popularity just after the new millennium dawned, especially in Southern California. But that business model had been upended by Covid, and it was only now making a comeback. Jimmy had been hired for six consecutive cruises, but the ship was only allowed by the Department of Transportation to leave open items in the ship’s maintenance logbooks for a set period of time. And so, the ship was scheduled to remain in port at Long Beach for a full day between the first two excursions while those issues were addressed.

Jimmy still wasn’t exactly sure how he had swung it, but his contract somehow included that most precious of perks: covered parking in a storage facility near the docks. In less than an hour after escaping the vessel, he was on the highway to a private healthcare facility in Whittier, which was nestled in the hills in the extreme western edge of the Metro Area, north of Anaheim. He hadn’t been paid on time before he left; and while he didn’t really need the funds after Melnyk’s envelope of cash, he didn’t want to let his employer off the hook, even if it was just for intern rates. He didn’t like the doctor the university had assigned him; but it was only for nine months. And, let’s face it, most people don’t like their boss, anyway. But his employer, a man appropriately named Smothers, was in rare form today. Not only had he still not made the direct deposit, he insisted that Jimmy see a patient, despite him still being “off the clock” for the next three weeks.

He had had just about enough of the asshole psychologist, and was in the process of telling the man so, when Dr. Smothers all but broke down; and he openly begged Jimmy to see the client. In an effort to sway his intern, the doctor actually sat down at his desk and wrote a check out to him immediately. The man seemed to be almost on the verge of tears; and Jimmy finally relented. In point of fact, Smothers had taught Jimmy a valuable lesson. After almost twenty-five years in practice, the man was still being crushed financially by eight years of student loans. That only steeled Jimmy’s resolve to do any and everything in his power not to follow in his financial footsteps, even if it meant putting off the degree.

But when he walked into the secondary office and saw who the client was, he almost reneged on his consent to see the patient. Sammy Schwartz was a little man with a big, big problem; one that was far beyond Jimmy’s ability to address. The fact that Smothers hadn’t wanted to do it himself was more than obvious; but shoving the problem off on an intern was way beyond the pale!

Sighing heavily, Jimmy took a seat across from the small man and flipped through the folder he’d picked up before he’d entered the room. It hadn’t changed from the last time he’d reviewed it.

“Good morning, doc,” Sammy greeted him warmly.

Jimmy couldn’t help but sigh heavily. “Sammy, we talked about this last week. I’m not the guy you need to see. You require help I cannot provide. You need medications that I am legally unable to prescribe. You need a psychiatrist, my friend. Dr. Smothers was supposed to make a recommendation.”

“Dr. Smothers is an ineffective curmudgeon and an incompetent dolt,” Sammy explained, with a dismissive wave of his hand. “I believe I told him so just a few minutes ago. I insisted on seeing you, but he lied and told me you were on vacation. I just happened to be looking out the window and saw you drive up; so, I explained to him very … emphatically … that you were obviously available, and that he should … um … withdraw from my presence.”

“You threatened him.”

“Oh, no. You told me not to do that to people. I trust you, and try to do as you suggest. I simply told him the truth.”

Jimmy didn’t know what to do … didn’t have a clue how to proceed. Sammy Schwartz was far more than a paranoid schizophrenic; he was psychopathic. A no shit, honest-to-God psychopath, who was now talking to a fucking intern in a neighborhood private healthcare psychology clinic!

His cell phone pinged. Oh, Christ! What else could go wrong? He gave it a glance. It was a text message from Beth: “Help! Urgent! Please call me immediately!”

“Sammy,” he groaned. “I really AM on vacation! I only came in to pick up a paycheck. Please excuse me for thirty seconds while I respond to this.”

The diminutive fellow gave another dismissive wave, indicating that the psych student should go ahead. Jimmy had never developed the ability to type with his thumbs, so he used a fingertip to explain that he was with a patient, and would call in half an hour. Then, he silenced the stupid phone and gave the patient his full attention.

“Okay, look,” he implored. “Please try to see this from my perspective. I’m not licensed in psychology. I’m just an intern. Not only do I not have experience with your problem, I haven’t even finished the courseload in grad school! And you shouldn’t be seeing a psychologist at all! You need a psychiatrist! Please, Sammy! Let me help you get to the right person to address your issues!”

“I’ve been to psychiatrists. Trust me, their drugs just make me dopey. One of them even started some sort of legal process to … and I quote … ‘get me help in a facility.’ I chose not to proceed with that course of action.”

This tidbit shocked Jimmy. “What psychiatrist? Is there a record of treatment? What’s his name?”

Sammy shook his head. “He’s no longer in the picture.”

“What do you mean by that?” Jimmy asked, trying his best not to growl.

“I mean that he’s no longer my doctor. YOU are, Dr. Rankstrom. You are the first doc that I actually like. You’re the first person I actually respect. I’ll talk to you and no one else.”

Jimmy shuddered a sigh. “Can’t you see my issue here? You DO realize that you are capable of harming either yourself or others. If you do something that eventually involves law enforcement, I am going to be the guy that everyone points fingers at. I would be the person responsible for allowing a patient under his care to perpetrate that harm. At the very best, I am going to be regarded as a failure in my chosen field.”

Sammy smiled. “Not an issue, doc! Harming myself is completely illogical. I don’t do illogic. I only do logic. And as far as harming others, you have my word that, as long as you continue seeing me, I will never harm another person.”

Jimmy’s eyes narrowed. “Now, that IS a threat!”

“No, doc. Swear to God.” He raised his right hand. “That isn’t a threat. That’s the truth.”

The intern could only try to steel himself for another thirty minutes with this man. He refused to be placating or condescending. He simply tried to be honest. The only time Sammy had shown any animosity during their sessions had been when Jimmy used that standard of psychoanalysis and asked him: “How does that make you feel?” The man was definitely averse to tropes; and so, as is often the case, the doctor had altered the course of the conversation to fit the patient’s whims. Hypnosis wasn’t even a consideration. There was patently no way a schizophrenic would accede to any loss of control.

They spoke the way friends would in a bar during Friday happy-hour; earnestly but truthfully. And eventually, finally, thankfully, their time was up. Jimmy reminded the smaller man that he would be gone for the next three weeks; and Sammy replied with his promise that he would “be good,” and that his doctor shouldn’t worry.

Jimmy waited patiently until the man had driven away, and then he marched boldly into Smother’s office without knocking. Fortunately, the doctor wasn’t with a client. The man didn’t seem to have the spine to feel defensive, and he acted more defeated than anything else. When Jimmy chided him for forcing a complex condition on an intern who was not qualified to treat it, he simply shrugged and agreed.

“That man scares the bejesus out of me!” the elder doctor said softly. “When I tried to use my standard therapies, I got the uneasy feeling that he was about to pull out a knife and cut my throat … though, of course, there were no spoken threats.” The man stood and walked to the huge bookcase behind the main desk; and he plucked three thick volumes from the shelves before handing them to Jimmy. Two were on schizophrenia and the other was on psychosis. Jimmy simply took them and turned silently away before the doctor spoke again. “Can you wait to cash that check for a few days? I’ll have the Medicare deposits before the end of the month, and things should be back in the black then.”

Shoulders slumped in utter defeat, Jimmy trudged back to his car. Taking a deep breath, he unmuted his phone and saw that Beth had sent three more long text messages. He didn’t bother reading them, simply hit her phone . It only rang twice.

“Jimmy! Where have you been?! Oh, Jimmy, it’s awful!”

“Are you okay?”

“It’s Tina!”

“Where are you?” he asked.

“Some hospital in Santa Ana! I don’t even know the name! It’s near where she lives.”

“What happened? Were you injured, Beth? What condition is she in?”

“No, no. It isn’t her … it’s her boyfriend!”

“Her boyfriend? The one who stood her up?” But then he groaned and put a hand to his forehead. “He DIDN’T stand her up, did he?”

“I went with her to get her things from her boyfriend’s apartment, and everybody kept asking and asking: How is he? Is he still in intensive care? And … I drove her to the hospital as she gave me directions; but she was crying and crying! And we finally found his room! And Jimmy, he’s in a coma! He was in a big traffic accident on the 405! And he must have been on his way to Long Beach to go on the cruise! And his cell phone was destroyed! But they pulled a suitcase out of the wreckage! And Tina looked inside! And Jimmy! There was a ring! He was going to propose! And for the last three nights, we’ve been in bed together! And oh, Jimmy! What am I going to dooooooo?!”

Ah, crap! His life was crumbling around him! A patient who had no right to BE his patient! A girl friend who was not a girlfriend, but who had the worst luck in the history of forever, and who needed his shoulder to cry on! The most attractive girl he had ever met, and who he’d helped set up for a procedure that LOOKED legit; but that in his heart, he knew was somehow nefarious! And a contract that was going to keep him away from home for the next sixteen days. On top of all that, he had to be back on the ship tonight to meet contractors that were putting in new fiber material for that stupid trick with the top hat. He felt like an octopus that was surrounded by eight kids all pulling on different arms.

At least things couldn’t get any worse.

Dinah Melnyk waited patiently for her new husband to unlock his … their … apartment door. She had never been here before, and all she could do was follow along, trying desperately to the floor and apartment number. He finally got the door open, and walked in, leaving her outside in the hallway, looking around. For some odd reason, she felt as if she ought to be invited inside. While working up the courage to cross the threshold on her own, a sandy-haired man walked up behind her, startling her, until she finally realized that he was simply ing, and he began unlocking the door next to hers … theirs.

“Well, hello there!” he said smoothly, too smoothly; and he looked her unabashedly up and down, from face to ankles, his gaze pausing to rest meaningfully at a couple places during the trip. He walked back from his door, and leaned against the wall next to the door frame, looking down on her.

She blushed. “Um … hi.”

“I didn’t know that weirdo in there …” He nodded in the direction of the open apartment door. “… ever hired hookers. But I’ve got to say, he certainly has good taste. I would love to spend some time with you, too. Do you think you could arrange that?”

She blinked up at him, wondering abstractly whether she was blushing, and she sought the right words to say to a neighbor. “I … I’m his wife. We’re married.”

He canted his head a little to the left, but he didn’t seem overly embarrassed by the declaration. “Well, I’ll be damned! I didn’t know the guy was capable of romantically attracting an exquisite creature like you.” He waited for a long thirty seconds. Finally, realizing the girl wasn’t going to do anything other than blink those big baby blues at him, he sighed. “I’m Ted. Your next-door neighbor. Sorry for the crazy introduction.” And he held out his right hand.

She took it automatically. “I’m Dinah.” She waited for him to let go. Eventually, he did.

“I hope we can be … neighborly.” He tried to shrug, but only one shoulder seemed willing to the action. “Please let me know if there’s anything I can ever do for you. Anything at all.” And he turned, walked back to his door, and was gone.

From within their apartment, she heard a toilet flush. “What the hell are you doing out there?” Melnyk barked from the short hallway. Quietly, she walked through the door and closed it.

There was only one bedroom, but the kitchen was spacious enough to include a round table with four chairs. In the living room, a couch and a single cushioned chair were facing a TV. A massive corner desk housed a computer keyboard and three large video screens next to each other, forming a sort of wraparound presentation. There were half a dozen rectangular boxy devices all strung together with wires, and she assumed that one of them was the computer itself, while the others were sizeable data storage devices. The largest peripheral was a multi-purpose printer, all the way to one side of the desk’s surface.

“I have to go out,” he told her. “I’ll be back for dinner at six. See if you can find something to fix.”

And he was gone. She felt … empty. Crushed. She couldn’t help feeling that she had betrayed him in some way. She had failed him. But how? She found a loaf of bread. A two-pound package of dried spaghetti. A jar of Ragu. There were three eggs that were in a carton displaying a long-ago date. Half a stick of butter.

She made herself busy with a broom from a closet. There was no mop, but she used a torn towel and a bar of soap from the bathroom, and she cleaned the kitchen floor on her hands and knees. There was a vacuum cleaner in the hall closet, as well; but it didn’t seem to be picking up anything. The bag inside was full, so she emptied it, meticulously, by hand, into a plastic bag, which she threw away. It worked a little then, so she used it on the couch and living room floor.

At five-thirty, she began fixing the spaghetti and heating the sauce. She mixed a little garlic powder in melted butter and some very old parmesan cheese, which she intended to apply to toasted bread. And was pleased with herself when the meal came together at six o’clock; but at six-thirty, he still wasn’t home. And a little after seven, he came in and announced that he’d already eaten and needed to work on the computer for some deadline that was looming the next day. So, she found a discarded lid to a cardboard box, and she used it as a tray for her warmed-over dinner in front of the TV while he worked, his back toward her, at his computer desk. She found it difficult to concentrate on the sitcom for several reasons. His three monitors often put out far more light than the small television screen; the program she was watching was obviously part of a grander plotline, and she couldn’t really piece together what was happening; and her mind kept drifting back to the cruise, during which she had made some real, live, actual friends! She missed them a great deal.

Somehow, it seemed late; but it was only a little after eight o’clock, when he whirled about in his desk chair, faced her, and ordered her to turn off the TV; which she did without question.

“,” he began, “we have an appointment at the elective surgical center first thing in the morning.”

“Ivan, I ….”

“You understand, I am sure, how much time, effort and expense I’ve gone through to make this happen.”

She lowered her eyes to the floor. “Yes, Ivan. Thank you. I’ll be ready to leave whenever you say.”

He nodded solemnly, but then pasted on a smile. “I have just received an email from Mr. Rankstrom. There’s an attachment that is meant for you.”

She frowned at him, but lowered her eyes again before replying. “Please don’t be cross with me, Ivan. But I don’t know who that is.”

“Rankstrom,” he repeated crossly. “The quote-unquote doctor you spent all your time with in that room on the ship.”

“Jimmy!” she shouted happily, leaping to her feet, her dinner plate flying off her lap. She regarded the overturned dish in mute horror. Thank God it was plastic, and hadn’t broken! She rushed to the kitchen and snatched a fistful of paper towels, then returned and scrubbed frantically at the spot of spaghetti sauce on the threadbare carpet. Finally, she worked up the courage to look up at her husband. “Jimmy sent me an email? Can I read it?”

“The email was to me,” he explained crossly. “I’ve already deleted it. But I saved the attachment. He asked that I let you view it.”

“Can I, Ivan? Oh, please!”

“Yes, yes. Of course. Come here. Sit in my chair. I always use headphones. Sit here, and I’ll put them on you and start the video.”

She ran to put the plate in the sink and throw away the paper towels, then followed Ivan’s directions as she prepared to see what Jimmy … Jimmy! … had sent her. The headphones dulled all sound, and she felt somehow disconnected as she stared, her heart beating furiously, at the black computer screens.

A sparkling drop of water fell from the top of the middle screen, hitting a glistening pool near the bottom of the monitor with a loud, liquid “poink,” and rings on a still pond radiated out to the screens on either side as another droplet formed and fell. “Hello, Dinah,” Jimmy’s voice radiated throughout her body, and especially in that hollow place in her lower belly. “I’ve missed you. I like you very much. I hope you listen to me. I hope you consent to do as I tell you. I hope you follow my suggestions. It would mean so much to me if you did.”

Jimmy liked her! “Oh, yes, Jimmy! I will! I promise!” she said out loud in a soft, adoring voice that she somehow couldn’t hear.

“Relax for me, my dear,” Jimmy told her. “Relax, and let my voice take you on a little trip. We’ll be together again if you let me take you.”

My dear. He had called her dear. He’d never done that; at least, she couldn’t him ever having done so. “I’ll let you take me anywhere, Jimmy,” she murmured softly … so softly that she couldn’t hear it in her own ears.

And he talked and talked. But after a while, he stopped. Oh, she wanted to hear more of his voice. She didn’t really care what he was saying … just so long as she could hear him some more. But her husband was shaking her awake. She didn’t want to, but she had to do what Ivan said.

“It’s after midnight,” he groused. “You’ve hogged my computer system enough for one evening. Get up, we’re going to bed. We have an early day tomorrow. Come, on. Get up.” And he turned off the computer.

She felt as if she had already been asleep for hours, and she wasn’t sleepy. She went into the bathroom while he put on pajamas and went to bed, and she decided to take a bath instead of a shower. But while the tub filled, she suddenly had an idea. Ivan kept a small beard-trimmer plugged into a trickle-chargers next to the sink, and she used it to gnaw away all of her pubic hair. She had no idea where the idea had come from; but she disionately didn’t care. Using her palms and fingers, she scraped all of the fine cut hairs together and wadded them into facial tissues before throwing everything into the trash.

And then, in the tub, she used a bar of soap and the disposable razor she had used on the ship to shave herself smooth: her legs and her underarms and … for the very first time … between legs and all around her groin and lower belly. She never touched herself sexually. She knew other women did, but she would never do that. However, she had read that men liked to touch women that way; and hers was a life of service to others. If men wanted that, then she would make herself available. But … when she thought “men,” she was really thinking “Ivan.” Right? Yes, of course. That must be what she was thinking.

Back in the bedroom, Ivan was snoring. She put on her flannel nightgown and crawled in beside him. They hadn’t had sex since that first night aboard the ship. Their wedding night. He would want her again … sometime. And she would be ready. She tried to think about their future together, but in her mind, she slowly saw water droplets falling onto the smooth surface of a pond. And she slept.

The next day, Ivan and the doctor at the clinic seemed to have a lot to talk about, but she couldn’t seem to concentrate on what they were saying. When the doctor very pointedly asked if SHE had any questions, all she could think to ask about was the anesthetic. The whole concept of giving into an intravenous sleep-inducing drug fascinated her. But, of course, the surgeon deferred those questions to the anesthesiologist, who she wouldn’t meet until tomorrow. Wait a minute … tomorrow? It was happening so soon!? But she shrugged mentally. What did it really matter, anyway? The only thing that startled her was an off-hand comment about her going home weighing between six and eight pounds more than she did when she came. She really wanted to ask about THAT. But she didn’t want to interrupt Ivan; and, after a time, she forgot what she had been about to say.

Back in the car, she implored Ivan to do some shopping. There was literally no food in the apartment! And she NEEDED things! She would be having her period in another few days, and she didn’t have the proper supplies. She’d made a list: a good razor, soap, shampoo, conditioner. There was another list of cleaning supplies for the apartment. He was not happy, but he relented, and she spent forty-five minutes in the huge drugstore. In the feminine hygiene section, she tarried much longer than Ivan wanted her to while she tried to what Tina had told her, and she finally chose a “douche kit” of some sort, primarily because it seemed to have an instruction booklet included, and she wasn’t sure if Ivan would share access to his computer to find out how to use it. After the drugstore, they spent another half an hour in a large department store, and yet another period of time in a grocery store. But he put his foot down when it came to stopping at a bookstore. She had finished her novel that first day aboard the ship; and now, she had nothing to read. He told her that he didn’t have time. He’d put something on her e-reader later. She would have argued, but his voice was beginning to get stern. She hated his stern voice.

She was a little surprised he hadn’t gone in to work for at least part of the day. It was a Wednesday. But he told her that he was working from home today. And so, she cleaned the apartment and put away all their purchases while he did whatever he always did at the big computer desk. At least he ate what she cooked for dinner, thin pork chops and rice, balancing melamine plates on their knees while they watched the news. But then, it was just like the evening before, with him working at the computer, his back to her, while she watched another program that she couldn’t seem to find sufficient interest in.

Meekly, she asked if she could watch the video again that Jimmy had made for her; but he told her that he couldn’t tie up his system with her stupid audiovisual file. To her amazement, he later relented; and he transferred the file to a laptop, then settled her into the living room cushioned chair with another headset; and, overjoyed, she allowed herself to drift away while listening to Jimmy’s rumbling voice.

When she awoke, it was morning. She had spent the whole night in the chair! Ivan must have put away the laptop and the headset; but why hadn’t he awakened her for bed? He cautioned her not to eat or drink anything; and he then reminded her that she had to shower with some sort of special, pre-surgical liquid soap. She didn’t talking about that at all at the doctor’s office; but then again, she didn’t seem to much of anything, now that she considered it. She allowed herself to be led by him; showering as he told her, putting on loose clothing, though he instructed her not to wear a bra. That made her feel embarrassed, self-conscious, exposed. She waited, mute, as he fixed himself an egg sandwich. They didn’t talk in the car.

She was surprised that they let her keep her panties on. But there was no covering up top … not even a hospital gown; and though they let her keep a sheet pulled up over her chest, doctors and nurses were constantly coming into the room and pulling it down, looking unabashedly at her chest. A nurse came in to put the IV into her inner left arm, and she watched the process in mute excitement.

“Is this going to make me sleepy?” she asked in awe.

“No, I’m just getting the drip going. Sleepy comes later.”

“Oh.”

Finally, finally, a man in saggy green clothes, including a shower cap-looking thing on his head and paper coverings over his shoes, came in with a hypodermic syringe. “Is that going to put me to sleep?” she asked breathlessly.

He smiled at her. “No, this is just to calm you down a little.”

“When are you going to put me to sleep?”

He checked his watch. “Pretty soon now.”

“Can I watch while you do it? Please?”

He laughed at that. “Sure. It’ll be my pleasure.” The man looked around him, making sure no one else was watching; then he reached out and pulled down the sheet, staring openly at her chest. “Wow. When you want a change, you don’t mess around, do you?” He turned and walked out. Hoping she wasn’t doing something wrong, she pulled the sheet back up.

The room was suddenly crowded with people. “Gonna’ lay you back now,” one of the masked individuals said, obviously female. Dinah was abruptly flat on her back, her head on a thin pillow. There was a loud “clunk,” and everything started moving. The bed was out in the hallway, moving somewhere.

“Aren’t you going to put me to sleep?” she asked, suddenly very concerned.

“Soon,” the doctor’s voice told her. “How are you feeling?”

“He …” she had no idea which of these people “he” was. “… gave me something to make me calm.” Her voice sounded weak.

They were in another room, and there was another “clunk” after the bed stopped moving.

“I’m cold,” she said.

“Not for long.”

There was another hypodermic syringe being plugged into the thing just below the hanging IV bag. The syringe was really full. “You ready, doll?” a voice asked.

“Yes! Oh, yes!”

Slowly, slowly, a thumb began pushing the plunger. A quarter of the way. Half the way.

And she was waking up. “How many fingers?” the doctor asked, holding a hand in front of her face.

“Um … four.” The bed was moving again. “But … you didn’t give me the whole ….” She ground to a halt when she realized that no one was listening to her. She was back in the preparation room. All of a sudden, she was sitting up again, and for a minute, she was alone. But finally, a woman came in and asked if she wanted something to drink. The nurse held out a glass of orange juice, and for the first time, Dinah had difficulty reaching for something. It took her a long time to figure out what the problem was. Her right boob was in the way, and her arm was having to press into it in order to reach across her body. It hurt.

The sheet was up above them again, and she was too embarrassed to pull it down herself. But something was definitely wrong. Ivan was suddenly there. Smiling. Ivan was smiling. Well, THAT was certainly something positive. But the smile fled as soon as the nurse walked back out.

“Ivan,” she said weakly. “Ivan, by breasts ….”

“Listen to me!” the man growled. Oh, God! She hadn’t thought that there might be a tone of voice worse than stern! “We all talked about this yesterday! You didn’t say anything about it THEN! The doctor has gone to a great deal of time and effort to do this just exactly the way you said you wanted it! You had better not have anything to say to that man other than to praise him for his professionalism and determination!”

She blinked up at him. “Yes, Ivan.”

He sat in a chair next to the bed, took out his laptop computer, and began clicking away at the thing. Dinah sipped her juice, but she couldn’t seem to make her mind grasp a coherent thought, and she stared at the curtain that was supposed to afford privacy from the medical people walking and talking beyond, as if this was simply another average day. After some indeterminate period, the curtain parted and the doctor, sans mask, along with a lady nurse, entered the cramped space.

Without preamble, the doctor pulled down the sheet and hefted Dinah’s left breast high. He glanced at her face as she moaned, but immediately returned his attention to the area just below her mammary. “There will be some discomfort for about a week,” he commented offhandedly. “Achiness rather than pain, really. We’re stretching quite a bit of tissue, here.” He dropped the gland and hoisted the right one, studying the underside carefully. “Wonderful!” he declared, finally releasing that breast, as well, and seemingly congratulating himself. “As we discussed yesterday, the incisions are only about two inches each. I filled the inserts after I had them in place with our thinnest gel because you said you wanted them soft and malleable, like they were before. And, as I explained, there are no stitches. We used surgical glue. I’ve placed three small butterfly bandages over the incisions, just to give them added protection. Keep the area dry for five days, then shower normally. After the bandages have gotten wet several times, they’ll peel off easily. Until then, Acetaminophen only for pain. Enjoy your new figure, young lady.” And he turned and left.

“You’re all ready to go!” the nurse told her happily. “I’m going to give you a free wheelchair ride out front!” She turned to Ivan. “You did bring her another blouse, didn’t you?”

Ivan closed his laptop, then hefted a briefcase onto the foot of the bed, opened it, and handed the woman one of his own shirts … a short-sleeve button-up dress shirt. Then, he carefully put the computer into the briefcase and shut it. “I’ll go bring the car around,” he muttered, and he walked out.

The nurse spent some time with the buttons, but she finally finished and shook the garment to get the folds and wrinkles out. “There’s a stain,” she said, frowning. “Maybe we can tuck it in or something.” She stripped the sheet from the patient and stood, contemplating. “Wow. It still might not fit! You really went for the full package, huh?”

“I … um ….”

The shirt was being maneuvered about her, and she dutifully inserted her arms where and when she was ordered. The nurse started at the bottom button, but it soon became obvious that the attire was going to be tight. She had to leave the top two buttons undone. Dinah blushed even more when it became apparent that she needed help with her shorts and sandals. She sat on the edge of the bed for a time while the nurse went for a wheelchair, but eventually, she was being pushed beyond a set of double-doors, through the waiting room (where she refused to allow her eyes to rise to the level of anyone else’s) and out into the blinding afternoon sunlight.

The nurse suggested that she run the shoulder strap of the seatbelt under her breasts for this ride, but they pressed against the incisions; so, she just pulled it out until it was loose, and she held it. “Have a nice day!” the woman chirped cheerily.

Risking a return of “the voice,” she told Ivan that she was very hungry and thirsty; and she was only mildly surprised when he relented and drove through a fast-food restaurant, ordering five small cheeseburgers, two orders of fries and two cokes. He hadn’t asked her what she wanted; and he simply handed her everything before continuing the drive to the apartment building. She sipped on one of the straws.

She followed slowly as he led the way to the elevator. Finally, inside, he held a kitchen chair for her. Her mind seemed to be filled with cotton. “I have some more work I have to get done,” he said. “Here. I got these for you.” And he produced three Better Homes & Gardens magazines. Then he picked up the food, put two burgers and a container of fries in front of her, and he walked into the living room. It took her a full minute to realize that he’d stolen the year-old magazines from the waiting room at the medical facility. She didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. It was probably the most romantic thing he had ever done.

Unable to maintain comprehensible thoughts, she folded her arms across an article about how to fertilize nasturtiums, and laid her head down on the table. Her breasts ballooned and hurt, so she scooted her chair back a few inches and let them hang down in front of the edge of the table; but she awoke with a crick in her neck, and got up to wander into the living room. Ivan was on the phone, and he waved her impatiently to silence while he turned his back to her and spoke in a low voice, so that she couldn’t hear. She felt guilty for interrupting, but his countenance wasn’t stern when he ended the call and faced her.

“You got another email from Mr. Rankstrom,” he said quietly.

“Jimmy?! Jimmy sent me an email? Jimmy! Oh, please, Ivan! Please let me read it!”

She stepped back at his expression. Did she dare to bring forth “the voice?” But, oh yes! The thought of Jimmy was like …. She didn’t know how to express it in her mind. She felt like she was alone, treading water in a large lake, far from shore, and Jimmy was a piece of flotsam. Something real. Something she could grasp and hold.

“He didn’t write anything,” Ivan growled. “He just sent an attachment. I haven’t looked at it.” He seemed to give it some thought. “I’ll copy the file to the laptop for you.”

Overjoyed, she ran to the cushioned chair and sat like a little girl waiting impatiently for a birthday present. “Why don’t you just …?” No, she thought. Don’t give him cause to be stern. But it didn’t make any sense. Why go to all the trouble of copying a file? Why didn’t he just open his email program on the laptop?

However, he seemed to be through doing whatever it was he was trying to do; and a long last, he was fitting the headset onto her and setting the small computer in her lap. With the tap on the touchpad, a droplet formed at the top of the small screen; then, almost reluctantly let go and fell and fell and fell into the still, clear pool, making a distinctive “poink” sound and sending liquid ringlets rippling across the pond and her mind.

“Hello, Dinah,” Jimmy said. “Are you ready to drift away again for me?” His voice resonated throughout her being, and especially inside that hollow little place below her belly. She suddenly realized that, given the strength of his rumbling voice, especially amplified by the headphones, the feeling was expanding. What would happen when the hollow place overfilled? Would she explode? That would be … wonderful.

“Yes, Jimmy!” she said aloud. “Yes, I’m ready!”

And the droplets fell, the sound chasing away all of her worries and anxiety. And his voice filled and overwhelmed her. And she woke up. She was stretched out on the couch with her head on a throw-pillow and a light blanket covering her. She blinked up at Ivan, unsure what was happening. Sunshine was streaming through the window.

“I have to go into the office,” he told her. “I should be back by six. I’ll call if I’m not planning on eating dinner with you. Sorry about the other night. Here.” And he handed over her e-reader. “I hooked it up to the Wi-Fi, so you can load another book. Oh, by the way, I’ve talked to a friend who needs a secretary. We could really use the extra income. I’m going to set up an interview for you. Have a nice day.” And he turned and walked out of the apartment.

She stood and tried to take stock. Her shirt (his shirt) had been completely unbuttoned, and her large, gelatinous breasts were fully displayed. He had obviously seen her when he tucked her in on the couch. But that shouldn’t concern her. He WAS her husband, after all. Had he touched them? Fondled them? Caressed them?

Worried about the lack of curtains on the living room window, she fled to the bathroom and stood before the large mirror behind the sink. Oh, my God, they were big! She had disliked her breasts before because they sagged and hung down on her chest. When she had mentioned it to her new friend, Beth, on the ship, she’d been told in no uncertain that NO woman was satisfied with her breasts; and that Dinah should be happy with what she had. Oh, why hadn’t she listened? These breasts sagged and hung down on her chest, as well; only on a much grander scale. Grand. Good term. They must be two or three times the size they were before!

She used both hands to heft her left breast to look at the incision underneath, only to find that she still couldn’t see it. She pulled upward until there was a sharp pain; and then she quickly gave up. She searched around for a hand mirror, but couldn’t find one; and she finally went to her purse to retrieve the little mirror in her compact. Holding the squishy breast in her left hand, the little mirror in her right, and staring into the big mirror in front of her, she could finally see the row of three stiff little butterfly bandages under the huge gland. The reddish-purple color startled her until she finally realized that they had swabbed the area with iodine before the operation. She tried looking under her right breast, but finally abandoned the idea. She was sore. Both boobs were. It was a constant, dull ache, like the day after a t had been sprained.

She ran the water in the sink until it was hot, soaked and squeezed out a washcloth, and tried her best to clean her entire body. She foggily ed the doctor telling her not to bathe for several days. She had nothing to wear. Her nightgowns were too small. EVERYTHING was too small! Exploring, she found a tee shirt with a beer logo, size XXL, in the top of his closet, obviously never worn because it didn’t fit him. It fit her like a small tent, except in the chest, where it was actually comfortable. Wearing that and a pair of panties and summer shorts, she fixed herself some breakfast and worked with the e-reader. She had no credit, and no to attach to the device; but she found several books that were “free s” to install. Most were first books in series that she would have to buy later to find out what happened, but it sure beat the boredom of the apartment.

She wished that she could listen to another session with Jimmy. She really had no idea how long they lasted, since she always fell asleep when she listened to one. But, of course, she had no way to access one of the files herself, since she didn’t know the s for the computers. The laptop wasn’t even around. He must have taken it to work with him. Oh, but she longed to hear Jimmy’s voice! She would probably never see the man again; and most of her time with him in that ship’s cabin was spent in uned trance. But she would always cherish that period they had together. Looking at it now, there was no doubt. She was in love with the man. Hopeless, unrequited love. How romantic. And all she would ever have was his voice in those email attachments. Ivan was such a dear … so understanding to let her listen to them. She wished he was home with her. But she could never let him know … never tell him.

The real reason she wanted him there was so she could listen to Jimmy on his computer again … so she could once more hear the voice of the man she loved.